SO YOU ARE VOMITING AND EATING CHOCOLATE CAKE?

Do you know that your brain is trained to focus on keeping you in state?

So if you like to think about being miserable, you will source out things to do and think about that make you feel that way.

If you train your brain to think positive thoughts, then you will do things that make you feel happy and stay in that frame of mind.

It is very hard to be doing something you really like, and then at the same time think of something you totally hate. For example, you can’t be eating your favorite piece of chocolate cake, and imagine the site and smell of someone vomiting.

But this is what we do when we are in the middle of affair recovery, or when we have constant negative intrusive thoughts. We “try” and have a great time with our partner, pretending to enjoy our self (POSITIVILY CODING OUR BRAINS THAT THIS IS FUN) while at the same time we want to scream out “Why did you have an affair? Why did you do this? Why did you do that? Why why why”(Coding our brains that the relationship is negative and painful). Our partner then starts to NOT want to spend time with YOU, because being with you is PAIN.

SO YOU ARE VOMITING AND EATING CHOCOLATE CAKE!

Check out my  YouTube Video on this......... http://youtu.be/_cVqGurXeI8

On of my solutions for this is to train yourself (and your brain) to:
1. Set a time each week to talk about your intrusive thoughts. Write them down. Tell your partner you need 30 mins to 1 hour every week to ask questions, and provide the level of detail you need these answers to be.
2. Allow yourself to be in the moment and have a good time. You both NEED to enjoy yourselves. Stop bringing up negative conversation during fun times.
3. Complement each other often, share your positive thoughts to each other. Open up a little and get vulnerable. It’s hard to think negatively when you are being complimented.


This is YOUR time,

Savannah

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